We Are EarthFormed

My Journey from Pudgy to “Perfect”: Reboot November 6, 2011

Sunday morning since it was the day of the time change I had some extra time for myself in the morning before getting ready for going to our weekly meeting. Over the past few weeks I’ve been thinking, again, about what I can do to get in shape, feel better about myself and increase my energy levels. I dug out my old Power 90 DVDs and decided to start working out again. Power 90 has been one of my favorite workouts. Tony Horton is very cheerful and motivating bordering on annoying, but no where near as much so as Tony Little. I can’t stand Tony Little.

A friend of mine allowed me to borrow the 10 minute workouts and I’ve been using them off and on over the past month. It got me so jazzed about exercising again that I decided to start taking it more seriously instead of a haphazard arrangement. Sunday I did the Power 90 Sculpt. For some reason I thought it was a 45 minute workout. It’s only 28 minutes including the warm up and cool down. I got looking at the back of the DVD case and the Sweat is only 36 minutes. Really this leaves me no excuse to not workout somehow every single day. I even have the Slim in 6 workout routine which is only 24 minutes and has some pretty decent stopping point if you want to cut the workout a little short or even in half.

After I did the Sculpt workout I was kind of in a bad mood. I’m not exactly sure why. I hadn’t had any coffee yet which may be part of the issue, but I think the workout made me reflect on how much I hated the way I am, how out of shape I was and how alone I felt.

Recently I’ve been feeling very ugly and rather disgusted with the way I look and the way I feel – physically and how it feels to wear clothes that don’t fit. I don’t want to go shopping for clothes that are bigger anymore. I want to shop for clothes that are smaller and fit into the beautiful clothing that I’ve had sitting in my closet for almost a decade. I’m sick of feeling this way. I’m sick of hating myself.