Next to my mom, my husband and my father-in-law you’d probably think I was a mute. In real life I’m more of a listener. Most of the time out of necessity because the people around me won’t be quiet long enough to let me get a word in edgewise or when they are quiet they just. . . don’t. . . care. I’ve always found it easier to express myself on paper (or in this case online) than I have in face to face or phone conversations.
On my blog like in my personal relationships I try to be kind, considerate and honest about what I’m sharing. I don’t like to give away too much about myself personally. That’s just the way I’ve always been. Whether I’m writing about myself or my family or something else I find it easier to censure myself especially when it’s a subject I’m passionate about. That may be one reason I don’t talk too much. By the time I’ve figured out how to say what I want to say without sounding like a jerk everyone’s already moved on to another subject. Problem is people end up thinking I have nothing interesting to say. Though public speaking (not extemporaneously though) doesn’t bother me I really do get nervous about having conversations one on one or in a group. I don’t want to sound like an idiot. I don’t know if I take myself too seriously or I don’t give myself enough credit, but either way that situation just stresses me out.
That being said I don’t think anyone in my family has ever read my blog. I really don’t mind that. If you judge me, call me crazy, think I’m stupid you have that right and probably won’t come back, but I’ll probably never know. It mortifies me to no end for the people close to me to read this and think those same things. There are some in my circle who have very strong ideas about the use of social media and “being online too much”. They have no inclination to try and understand what I’m trying to do. So my voice is for YOU. All you loyal readers who either agree or disagree with what I have to say, but at least you get it and that’s why you keep coming back. Thanks for that.